31 days of change :: day 29 {fighting change}

I began this 31 day series on change mainly thinking about the sheer amount of overwhelming change going on in our lives currently...  pursuing adoption... buying a house... renovating said-house... job transitions... new leadership roles... etc, etc.  One thing I didn't really expect to think much about was my own inner-battle with change itself.

I fight change.

I do.  I didn't really realize it before... but I do.  My natural inclination is to fight what feels different... to fight the unknown... to fight anything outside of my comfort zone.  I like consistency.  I value routine.  I appreciate preparedness.  And when I can't get those things, I kind of freak out.  Like, pure-overwhelming-anxiety-attack-freak-out.  It wasn't really until this 31 day series that I truly realized my desire to fight change.

And it's not that I don't believe that change can be a good thing... because I do.  I mean, honestly... all of our overwhelming changes are good things right now... adoption- duh... new house- yes... renovating said-house- of course...

So, why do I still fight it?  

Because it's unknown.  Because I can't plan for it.  Because it's beyond my control.  And I'm finally beginning to learn, that it's that place of vulnerability that is the very best place to be.

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For the month of October I'm doing a 31-day series on "change."  Go here to see the full line-up of "change" posts.